Already Gone
by VividInk
Summary: [Oneshot] It didn't matter if she ended her life right there and then, for she had already been gone long ago... dead on the inside... CloTi & TxCxA Love triangle.


Title: Already Gone

_**A/N: Sorry I posted this before posting my next chapter of 'A New Day', I suddenly got some inspirational surge last night while reading a book and I couldn't get this plot out of my mind since then. This fic is pretty much angst and I'm sad to say it won't have a happy ending, for CloTi fans that is. Feel free to vent your anger at me through a review, but don't be too harsh since I really get put down by harsh flames.**_

_**P.S Aerith isn't dead in this story. **_

"Tifa?" called Yuffie quietly as she slowly pushed open the brunette barmaid's bedroom door. The barmaid's bedroom was pitch black, but somehow, the ninja girl could still see Tifa's silhouette in the gloomy darkness.

"Yeah?" asked Tifa softly, her many different moods coming across to Yuffie as another one of Tifa's major mood swings.

The ninja girl slipped into the brunette girl's bedroom and flicked on the light. The barmaid had drawn all her bedroom curtains, thus creating the dark and gloomy atmosphere in her room, though the sun was just beginning to set beneath the horizon.

"What the hell did you make your room so dark for? It's not good for your eyes; sitting in the darkness like that." Said Yuffie knowingly, folding her arms and approaching Tifa, who was sitting on the edge of her bed, looking hurt and lovelorn.

"What's up? Shouldn't you be with Vincent?" asked Tifa, trying to mask the emotions of deep hurt, loneliness and sadness as she stared up at the ninja girl with her most convincing facial expression.

It was 6 months after the last battle and Cloud had once again triumphed over Sephiroth. Things had seemed to pick up from their old, slow and darkened pace too. The AVALANCHE members all seemed to be living fruitful and fulfilling lives, all but one, Tifa Lockhart.

Yuffie bit her lip feeling a wave of uneasiness wash over her. She had come to tell Tifa about something she had just seen at White-water Springs. It was a sight that would probably cause Tifa to break down completely, and the ninja girl was now contemplating about whether she should break the news to the brunette barmaid at all or not.

"It's just that, you've changed a lot ever since the last battle. You seem so-" said Yuffie uneasily, as she continued chewing her bottom lip, but she was cut off by a long sigh.

"Don't worry about me. I'm just tired, that's all." Said Tifa, forcing a wide grin at the ninja girl, who just looked at the barmaid with a look of pure disbelief on her face.

"You always say that, Tifa! No offence but you're a very bad liar!" barked Yuffie impatiently. The ninja girl was sick and tired of seeing the barmaid work endlessly day after day, exhausting herself and returning to her bedroom and crying herself to sleep. Why? All because she was lonely and unloved!

Tifa jumped at Yuffie's sudden outburst, her gaze still fixed on the ninja girl. The brunette girl's face fell, her gaze falling to her lap as she just clenched the bedcovers tight within her fists.

"You're lonely, lovelorn and hurt, aren't you? You feel unwanted and like there's no one there for you to love and turn to, right?" asked Yuffie in a scolding manner, her tone becoming harsh but filled with concern for her friend.

Tifa felt the familiar choking feeling swarm into a mass in her throat. The hurt was coming back again, shooting through her chest, sharp and painful, jolt after jolt.

_DAMN RIGHT, Yuffie, DAMN RIGHT! _Tifa felt like screaming those words right out into the ninja girl's face. Even if she did do so, could Yuffie do anything to change that fact? No.

Cloud was in love with Aerith and vice-versa. Yuffie had Vincent to love and care for. Cid had his wife, Shera. Barret had Marlene to take care of. Nanaki had a family to provide for and Denzel had even found his biological parents, after going through a series of paternity, maternity and biological tests!

Everyone had someone, except her! Tifa Lockhart, the lonely soul of AVALANCHE! Lovelorn, hurt, unloved and unwanted!

"Yuffie, is lecturing me your purpose of coming here into my room?" asked Tifa, her eyes welling up with her pearly tears as she looked up at the ninja girl.

"No, I actually came to tell you what I saw back at White-water Springs, but I'm still thinking about whether I should tell you or not after seeing the state you're in now!" snapped Yuffie angrily, glaring at the brunette barmaid.

Yuffie had been out exploring a little when she had come across Cloud and Aerith making love in a spring pool filled with rose petals. It was a sweet and loving sight to the ninja girl, but she knew very well that it would be a heartbreaking and devastating sight for Tifa.

"Why contemplate about it Yuffie? You already told me that you saw something, so tell me!" barked Tifa sternly, her tears spilling forth and rolling down her alabaster cheeks.

"No, I won't! You look pathetic enough and I'll do anything else but tell you what I saw!" Yuffie snapped back, folding her arms and closing her eyes, holding her nose high in the air.

Tifa knew Yuffie was headstrong and stubborn and almost nothing could change her mind when it had already been made up. For a moment, Tifa felt like it was hopeless prying on, but an idea came to her mind.

"Fine then, be that way." Said Tifa quietly, wiping her tears away with the back of her hand and returning her gaze to Yuffie. "If you won't tell be about what you saw, _show _me."

Yuffie's eyes snapped open, and she cursed herself mentally for letting Tifa win her in that spoken battle, which had just taken place seconds before.

Yuffie breathed in deeply, "No."

Tifa's eyes widened angrily, "You indirectly made a deal, Yuffie! You said you'd do _anything_ else but tell me. So if you won't tell me, then _show _me!"

Yuffie could feel her tears of anger fill her eyes as she bit her tongue. She had no other option; she'd either take Tifa to White-water Springs and show her what she had seen or take on Tifa one on one in a fight, which would very well break out, if she went against the barmaid's wishes.

Yuffie cursed herself continuously as she gestured to Tifa to follow her as she slowly exited Seventh Heaven and began heading to White-water Springs, which was about a 5 minute walk away from the bar.

The ninja girl could only hope now that Cloud and Aerith had finished their little lovey-dovey frenzy and had left the area.

Tifa could only wait in suspense as her heart pounded hard and fast against her chest. The fact that Yuffie had almost refused to expose what she had saw made the barmaid sick in the stomach as she had the utmost feeling that it involved Cloud and Aerith.

Yuffie was approaching the corner to where the spring pool was and she prayed with all her heart that Cloud and Aerith wouldn't be there. However, as she and Tifa silently turned the corner, Yuffie could feel the dread spread in her gut as she heard Tifa gasp at the sight.

It turned out the blonde warrior and the Cetra were still there and were passionately kissing as they sat in the rose-petalled pool, their bodies bare.

Tifa straightened her knees when she felt them buckle slightly. Yuffie could only watch Tifa sadly as the brunette barmaid just watched the love of her life make love and pour his entire soul out to another girl.

Tifa could only turn quietly and spring off silently as she buried her face in her hands and ran down the dusty streets of Midgar, a frantic Yuffie following along not far behind.

Tifa pounded up the colossal stairway of Seventh Heaven before darting into her room and closing the door behind her before she fell to her knees on the floor, crying her heart out. She didn't blame Yuffie for almost refusing to expose her sighting.

However, the brunette was somehow glad that she had seen what she had just seen. She loved Cloud deeply and would give her life for him if the situation called for but she just wanted him to be happy.

If Cloud loved Aerith and was happy with her, then so be it. Even if Tifa managed to break the bond between the Cetra and Cloud, she would never have that little thing that Aerith had to make Cloud happy.

Of course, she'd never try to do anything rash, such as ruining the loving bond that Aerith and Cloud shared.

"Tifa! Open up!" yelled Yuffie, as she pounded on Tifa's bedroom door.

"No! Go away! Leave me alone!" screamed Tifa tearfully as she let her tears fall to the floor, droplet after droplet. She didn't want to bother bottling up her emotions of controlling her tears, for it would only bring more pain.

Yuffie seemed to have heard Tifa, and much to the barmaid's surprise, the ninja girl stopped her yelling and pounding.

The barmaid's eyes wandered over to her closet, where she could see a simple but beautiful white dress hanging on a hanger. It was her mother's wedding dress and Tifa vowed that she would too wear it on her own wedding day, if it ever came.

Tifa swallowed hard as she bore the hurt in her heart as she crawled on all fours back to her bed and climbed with much difficulty onto it and buried her face into the soft comfort of her pillow.

The hazel-eyed girl cried her eyes out until she fell into a deep slumber. For how long she didn't care, she just wanted to forget everything.

Two hours passed and Cloud returned to Seventh Heaven, to find Yuffie sitting by the bar counter, looking rather worried and uneasy.

"Hey, where's Tifa?" asked Cloud curiously, seeing that Yuffie was the only figure behind the bar counter.

Yuffie gulped. Cloud cared for Tifa a lot, but not in the sense Tifa wanted him to. The blonde warrior regarded Tifa as a good friend and loved her like a brother would to his sister.

"She's in her room. Where's Aerith?" asked Yuffie, taking in a deep breath.

"She went to get a few groceries," replied Cloud, grinning at the ninja girl before noticing the worried expression on her face.

"What's wrong? Is Tifa alright?" asked Cloud, as though he had the ability to read people's minds. Realising that Cloud was heading for the stairs, Yuffie jumped in front of him and attempted to stop him.

Cloud however, never ceased in his footsteps. He just continued walking up the stairs, Yuffie backing away up her stairs spewing thousands of excuses, which were worthless since Cloud was making no attempt to listen.

Cloud was about to barge into Tifa's room when Yuffie stopped him. "Wait!"

Cloud looked at Yuffie suspiciously his eyebrow raised. "Well, what is it?"

"Before you go in there, there're a few things you need to know." Said Yuffie boldly, taking in a very deep breath before proceeding to tell Cloud about Tifa's feelings for him since she first saw him after 7 years.

"So, she's loved you for ages and you've never really acknowledged her feelings. Aerith knew about Tifa's feelings too, if I'm not wrong. Even I used to have a crush on you until I met Vinnie, but of course, my feelings were never as serious and deep as Tifa's." explained Yuffie, her long explanation coming to an end as she summarised the entire thing in three sentences.

"Aerith knew? Why didn't she ever tell me?" said Cloud, his eyebrows furrowing in deep thought.

Yuffie pursed her lips and rolled her eyes, "You can't be that dense, can you? Aerith is your girlfriend; would a girlfriend tell her lover that another girl has loved him for years? No."

Cloud decided he had heard enough from Yuffie and decided to check on Tifa. The brunette girl had been listening to Yuffie and Cloud's conversation and was prepared when Cloud entered her room and shut the door behind her.

"Do you need something?" asked Tifa, as she tried to hid her face behind the curtain of her hair as she stared down into the streets of Midgar. It had begun to rain and the raindrops fell lightly onto the glass window, sliding down the window panes.

"Yuffie looked really worried when I returned and I decided to check up on you." Said Cloud softly, taking a few steps forward and stopping behind her back.

Tifa was shaking and he could see it. Her long slender fingers were pale from the cold and by what Yuffie had just told him, he could only assume, with a sickening feeling in his stomach, that her heart was probably just as cold.

"Well, I'm fine now. So you can go now," said Tifa quietly, that was an obvious hint of sadness in her voice.

"Tifa, I'm sorry." Said Cloud boldly, looking at her long, black, silky hair.

"Why are you apologising?" asked Tifa, trying to sound innocently curious, though she knew very well why he was apologising after his conversation outside her bedroom door with Yuffie.

"Yuffie told me everything, about your feelings and how lonely you are right now. I'm sorry but I can't return your affection and love," admitted Cloud, looking out the window at the stormy skies.

"I know," was Tifa's saddened and hurt reply, as she felt more tears glide smoothly down her cheeks. "I saw you and Aerith earlier at White-water Springs."

Cloud drew in a sharp intake of breath after hearing the barmaid's words. He saw Tifa gaze down at him and when she gasped, he knew she had spotted the ring on his left hand. He had proposed to Aerith at the springs that afternoon, which was probably one of the reasons they made love after.

"I'm really sorry, Tifa." Apologised Cloud yet again as he reached out for her hand and for a moment he could feel how icy cold they were, before she pulled away.

Tifa choked out a laugh through her tears, "You're one guy I know who loves apologising."

Cloud bit his lip, he knew she was probably feeling like shit and walked all over, since it had been her who housed him for the past two years and still she never managed to get any affection out of him.

"If you'd agree to it, I'd like you and Yuffie to be the witnesses at me and Aerith's wedding." Said Cloud bravely, realising he was being rather thick at even giving asking her for such a favour when she was in such a lovelorn state.

"I should be the one apologising. I'm being selfish again. If you love Aerith, then so be it. I can't force you to love me and I'd never be able to give you the happiness she can. I'd be honoured to be one of the witnesses at your wedding," said Tifa, wiping her tears away. "I have to learn to move on,"

Cloud grinned in relief, she understood after all. "Thank you, Tifa, for understanding."

The blonde warrior hugged Tifa, and she slowly wrapped her arms around him in return, realising it would be last time she'd get to hold him close. "Good luck, I hope the both of you live fruitful lives."

Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

_The Wedding Day._

Yuffie sat beside Tifa on one of the church pews as they watched Cloud and Aerith exchange vows. Though Tifa's face was filled with joy and happiness, the ninja girl knew it was just another one of Tifa's very good masks.

Yuffie knew that Tifa was scarred for life and that she would no longer be the same bubbly and optimistic Tifa she once was. The hopeful glint in Tifa's eyes had vanished completely, leaving nothing but a blank in her hazel-eyes.

Once Cloud and Aerith had exchanged vows, the priest pronounced them man and wife and the whole church erupted in cheers and claps.

Tifa put on a very good convincing front that day, and she knew so since everyone seemed to believe her and no one asked her if she was alright. However, she knew that though that day was the day of Cloud and Aerith's marriage, she knew it would also be the last day of her life.

Ever since she found out that Cloud was engaged to Aerith, she had planned to end her life after the marriage. It didn't matter if she ended her life right that day, for she had been gone long before this.

There was nothing left of her but just a shell, which represented her physical being. She was going to go to White-water Spring that day and jump off the cliff into the raging waters of the waterfall. No one would survive those falls, not even someone with the strongest will to live.

Tifa returned to Seventh Heaven after the wedding. Yuffie was with Vincent attending the wedding dinner, which suited Tifa all too well, since she wouldn't have to deal with the ninja girl's pleads and cries.

Tifa turned to her closet and took out her mother's wedding dress. She had once vowed to wear it when she wed the young man of her dreams, but since that young man had chosen someone else over her, no wedding was going to take place, so she might as well wear it as she jumped to her death.

Tifa slid the dress over her head and put it on. It hugged her perfectly and she looked stunning without any make-up. The brunette barmaid walked barefoot out of an empty Seventh Heaven, ignoring the pain the gravel caused on her bare feet as she walked to White-water Springs.

Finally, she came to the foot of the cliff, the sound of the raging falls thundering in her ears. The wind whipped at her face as she let her tears fall once more. No one needed her, life Yuffie said, she felt unwanted, lonely and unloved, but not only did she feel so, it _was so_.

Scene after scene of the happy times she had shared with Cloud, Marlene, Denzel and the rest of AVALANCHE filled her mind as she stepped closer toward the edge of the cliff.

Tifa took in her last breath, "_I love you, Cloud_, _I'm sorry if I ruined your wedding day._" Before her knees buckled and she fell forward, her body hitting the falls, never to be seen again.

Yuffie had told Vincent and everyone else about Tifa by now and she told them to swear to secrecy about the matter. However, everyone was getting worried now when the ninja girl said that no one was picking up the phone back at Seventh Heaven.

"Tifa never ignores the phone!" cried Marlene, nearly breaking into sobs as she watched Yuffie eagerly. Denzel and his parents were there too at the wedding dinner and they were all looking desperately at Yuffie.

The ninja girl cut off the line before shaking her head in defeat, "She's not answering. I'm going to check up on her,"

"We'll all go, what's the wedding dinner without her?" said Aerith, trying to sound cheerful instead of immensely worried.

One by one, all got into vehicles, rushing back to Seventh Heaven, hoping to find the barmaid there.

Cloud and Yuffie were the first to burst through the doorway of the bar and up the stairs to Tifa's room, everyone else searching the entire house upside down for any sign of the brunette.

No one, no sign of the barmaid, nothing but a note on her dresser, which Yuffie found along with Cloud.

_To whoever is reading this,_

_I'm sorry but don't bother coming to look for me._

_By the time you read this I would've been long gone from the face of the Earth._

_It doesn't matter if I end my life now,_

_For I have already been gone long ago._

_Tifa Lockhart._

Yuffie looked up at Cloud, both looking at each other in disbelief. They were disrupted by a call from Barret outside, who said he had found a trail of footprints leading away to White-water  
Springs.

"She wrote a note!" said Cloud worriedly, handing it to Aerith who read it before her hand flew to her mouth.

"What did it say?" asked Marlene frantically, as she followed the crowd of adults, whom were all running off toward the falls.

The footprints came to an end at the edge of the cliff and it wasn't long before Yuffie realised in sheer horror that Tifa had committed suicide.

"'_For I have already been gone long ago',_ What the hell is that supposed to mean?" asked Cid, the last to arrive at the cliff's edge with Shera, who gasped.

Aerith burst into tears and buried her head into Cloud's chest. Cloud was looking shocked and disbelieving as he stared into the falls below. There was no chance Tifa could've survived such ferocious falls.

Yuffie broke down as well and it took a mere number of seconds before everyone else did. Marlene and Denzel were crying noisily into Cloud's back as they held the blonde warrior from behind. Cloud too had silent tears falling in streams down his face.

If only he had realised Tifa's love for him sooner. Maybe something could've grown between them and none of this would've happened. No hurt, loneliness or death but it was too late now wasn't it? Tifa was gone and nothing would bring her back.

Yuffie sobbed loudly as she snuggled up to Vincent, "What she wrote in her note, it just means that she had died long ago, on the inside."

_**A/N: I did warn you guys that there would be a tragic ending! Don't say I didn't warn you! Anyways, I know this was thoroughly depressing and I'm in tears now myself but pls do review and tell me what you think, just don't be too harsh!**_


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